You may be wondering what clever psychological tricks you could use in your everyday life to make it easier. Well, wonder no more, because these Reddit users offer brilliant ideas.
Electricpants I work in an office. When people stop by my desk and refuse to leave me alone I will get up and refill my water bottle while they are talking to me. Instead of walking back to my desk, I walk them to theirs. They instinctively will sit down. Then I just sever the convo and get back to work.
Amo4sho4sho I’m a professional poker player. When I am in a pot with one other player, I often try to make them laugh when they are thinking about what to do. If you can get them to laugh, it sets them in a mood where they are unlikely to bluff.
Jimeh86 This isn’t something I’ve used but I think it’s worth sharing. Derren Brown said that once there was a muscley drunk guy that wanted to beat him up and said the classic “what are you looking at.” Derren replied with “the wall outside my house is four feet tall.” The idea is that it puts the aggravated person on the back foot and takes them out of that adrenaline filled state. Anyways he sat down and the guy started crying to him about his gf. He is Derren Brown though so I wouldn’t recommend this to everyone.
mooncake22 If you need to remember something, think about it while doing something noticeably unusual. This will pair the memory with the “something”, so that when it is noticed later on it will trigger that particular memory.
Orpheus91 If you need to deescalate someone and get them to communicate… Asking questions about numbers/personal information (I work in emergency services). If someone is totally distraught and shut down, asking their phone number/address/ssn/birthdate can pull them out of the emotional place and bring them back to a headspace where they can talk about what happened more easily. I often ask these questions even after I have the information just to deescalate.
michellemeetsworld I stopped apologizing for things that I didn’t have control over and stopped saying thank you for things that don’t need gratitude. It makes for much stronger and more empowered conversation without coming across as a jerk.
Scizzayo I pretend to be really bad at lying so when I do have to lie it is super effective.
BONERSTORM When someone starts making fun of you, you make fun of yourself in a more clever way. If the person is doing it for attention, it wrestles the attention away from them if you’re more funny then they are and gives them negative feedback towards making fun of you going forward. It doesn’t always work because some people do it purely for self enjoyment, but at least it will be clear pretty fast that the person is a piece of shit, which comes with it’s own social drawbacks. So in the end the person has the choice between getting outdrawn or looking like a bully.
aaronmicook I currently manage around 240 people between 6 restaurants. It is often hard to get them to do what is needed. I have found saying “I need your help” is sufficient to get them on board. People want to feel needed and like they are making a difference. Expressing to them as much makes all the difference in the world.
pinky0926 When someone is trying to throw excuses or generally if they’re getting a bit arsey about something, often the best way to handle it is to stare back with mild interest and contribute nothing to their monologue. If you don’t give them anything to work with they’ll talk themselves into a corner and lose confidence in what they’re saying.
usrnmtkn1 I work as a Creative Director. I have a lot of great clients, unfortunately with a few shitty managers from their side. They usually go with the mantra of “If it’s not my idea, it’s not a good idea”. I end up (sometimes) telling them about something Google, Tesla, Amazon, Samsung, Etc. is doing, and how we could try it. They jump at these ideas. The ideas are actually mine or my teams. Works like a charm.
ManOfManySales Whenever I know somebody is holding some truth from me, I’ll look at them and stay silent – no nodding, no acknowledging – just looking. The silence usually brings out the truth or extra detail. If they squirm around a bit you know there’s something they have exaggerated etc.
jakobdee To avoid workplace drama and be well liked is to just compliment people behind their back.
LastUsernameAvail When I had something important to say to my kids, I would say it very quietly so that they would listen. They were immune to my yelling but whispering got their attention.
ElephantElmer If a child tells you they’re afraid of a monster in a closet, instead of telling them there is no monster, ask them to describe the monster and what they think the monster is doing there in the first place. Then ask how to get the monster to leave. It will help them alleviate their fear far more effectively than instinctively trying to tell them there is no monster.
alskdjfhgtk When I do something annoying or bothersome to my husband and he goes quiet, I wait a few minutes and then I ask him a seemingly innocent question, usually on the subject of how certain parts of a car works, or something mechanical. This gets him talking about the car thing and he rambles for like 5 minutes and then bam! He’s happy again and not quietly brooding. I’ll never tell him I do that because I’m afraid it won’t work anymore if he knows about it. It’s foolproof though, it works every single time, no matter how bothered he is.
Le_Lorinel If someone says they have the hiccups, ask them to prove it. 9/10 times, their hiccups will disappear. Having to summon a hiccup in order to demonstrate will trick your diaphragm into just not hiccuping.
Hasp3 Thanking someone for a trait you want from them. Instead of telling a customer you’re sorry for their wait, tell them thank you for your patience or understanding. Works wonders.